Hahahaha – I was right the first time!
Even non-verbally?? Dang, I guess I should stop “subtly” poking Matt’s belly. Being married has not good for either of our diets. Super bummer coming into swimsuit season!
4. Be the mirror.
Mirror, cheerleader, same thing. Matt has been awfully busy at work for awhile now. His new position has required him to learn a lot of new things and perform in a much more fast-paced environment, so it’s my job as a good wife to tell him he’s awesome, he’s best employee ever, etc, etc. You’d be surprised what I come up with sometimes!
I couldn’t have said anything better than what Lydia did, so enjoy: Marriage is not conditional. It is permanent. Your husband will be with you until you die. That is a given. It sounds obvious, but really making it a given is hard. You tend to think in "ifs" and "thens" even when you've publicly committed to forever. If he does this, I won't tolerate it. If I do this, he'll leave me. If I get fat. If I change jobs. If he says mean things. If he doesn't pay more attention. It's natural, especially in the beginning of your marriage, to keep those doubts in your head. But the sooner you can let go of the idea that marriage is temporary -- and will end if certain awful conditions are met -- the sooner you will let go of all kinds of conflict and stress. Yes, you may find yourself in a horrible situation where it's absolutely necessary to get a divorce. But going into it with divorce in the back of your mind, even in the way way way back of your mind, is going to cause a lot of unnecessary angst. Accept that you're going to stay with him. He's going to stay with you. Inhabit that and figure out how to make THAT work, instead of living with the "what if"s and "in case of's."